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Friday, November 2, 2012

ANYBODY GOT RYE BREAD?



When our kids were small, they ate their meals in the kitchen, seated at a table that was attached to the wall.  Rather than just having them face a blank wall I put up a large (3’x5’) world map.  When they asked why, I told them that I thought the colors were pretty.  I never said, “Learn”, but LEARN they did!  What else did they have to look at—each other?  Matt needed a little help for an elementary school geography test, though.  The test was a US map with the states outlined, but unnamed.  He had to be able to tell which each state was.  Mnemonics (like HOMES for the Great Lakes) can be wonderful memory aids.  There were 2 areas which were a problem for him so it was Mommy to the rescue.  From west to east are Mississippi, Alabama & Georgia.  I drew an alligator, sneezing, with a very red nose.  She was “Miss Alla G.” (allergy).  For Ohio, Indiana & Illinois I drew the picture below.  It apparently helped.  Matt is now 50 & we both remember these drawings--& state locations-- clearly.

We were out to lunch with our daughter, a college student, in Italy.  She ordered an appetizer platter of shrimp & calamaretti (baby squid).  My husband, not an adventurous eater, was picking out the shrimp to eat.  After much nagging coaxing he had a calamaretto (the singular) almost to his mouth when she said, “They’re better if you knock their little eyes off, Daddy!”  It took a couple of years before he deigned to try them—now he loves them.
Calamaretti fritti

          My friend was waiting in a bar to join her friends for dinner.  The waiter offered her some calamaretti.  She asked what they were & he told her.  She was about to try one when she asked him what the little things sticking out were.  He told her they were tentacles.  Down went her hand!  She thought he’d said “testicles”.









An exotic food joke: Poachers in Africa opened a restaurant.  Their come on was: “We make sandwiches from ANY African animal!  If we can’t make your sandwich, we’ll pay you $10,000.00!!”   Business was booming for months.  They sold sandwiches made of ground zebra, lion pot roast, leg of hippo, etc.  One day the waiter tries to place an order with the cook.  Together, they sadly go to the manager & tell him that he’s going to have to pay the $10,000.00.  He asks why & they tell him that a customer just ordered an elephant ball sandwich on rye.  He tells them that’s no problem—a new shipment of elephant balls just came in.  The cook says, “I know that!  The problem is, we’re out of rye bread!!”

A reminder:


The incredible (& inedible) fishducky



22 comments:

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    1. Watch it--I hate when someone "out-clevers" me!!

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  2. LOL! I just ate fish eggs for the first time on Halloween. That was all for Shane. I hope he had a good birthday *still smiling*

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    1. I eat fish eggs all the time--I love caviar & sushi!

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  3. I don't know, I mean I may not try squid bit my daughter says they are pretty good. I alike Miss Ala G . The fifty nifty song that our kids used to recite is now playing in my head. I would turn back the clock to when kids were home.

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    1. Would you believe I'd never heard the "Fifty Nifty" song until I googled it just now? My daughter shares the birthday of Hawaii becoming a state.

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  4. When we were in Durango,CO my friend ordered calamari. I have no idea why. Anyway, after trying them she called the waiter over and said "I don't know what this is; but this was never alive. I suspect it's some petroleum product."

    The moral of the story: Do not order seafood from the ocean in small mountain towns.

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    1. I think Goodyear makes them, because if you overcook them, they turn into tiny pieces of tires!

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  5. I love the way you made learning fun for your kids. Just don't let them in on the secret that they're learning something.

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  6. What a clever mom and great blogger you are! I love calamari. I haven't had it in years.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. THANK YOU! I haven't had it for a couple of weeks--I'm overdue!!

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  7. So if I turn my clock back an hour, does that mean I don't have to do my hour on the treadmill?

    (BTW LOVE the picture of the INdian... Awesome!)

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    1. The way I understand it, when you wake up, you will have already not done it, so I don't see why you'd have to repeat it!

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  8. When I turn my clock back, it for sure means I have to get up a lot earlier to walk Samson in the dark!!! Well, dawn, I should say.

    I think that your teaching methods were absolutely brilliant. What a great teacher you would have been.

    Finally, I loved the one about the calamari being underdone.

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    1. I would have been a wonderful teacher, except for having to work with kids!

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  9. Your posts are always so much fun. Kinda like watching a stand-up comic, except of course, I can't actually SEE you or HEAR you, and I have a feeling you're sitting DOWN. Other than that, it's just the same...

    The way you helped your kids learn is absolutely brilliant.

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    1. You're right--I spend most of my days at the computer, where I'm usually sitting down. There must actually be some sitting-down-stand-ups working in clubs! About my kids learning--it was fun for me!!

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  10. Now I kind of want salt and pepper squid for dinner. I guess a trip to the Vietnamese takeaway is in order!

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    1. I've never tried that. Is it as good as calamaretti fritti?

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  11. Dear Fishducky, I so liked learning about the geography map and how you helped your son learn the states. Stories like that get told and retold down through the generations! Peace.

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    1. I have the feeling they're going to talk about fishducky for a long time!!

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