Wednesday, December 12, 2012


(Someone sent me this email this past summer.  I can't remember who, but thank you!  I am deliberately posting it in December because if I posted it in the summer some of you would be afraid to send your kids to camp!) 

Dear Mom,

Our Scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV & got worried.  We are okay.  Only 1 of our tents & 2 sleeping bags got washed away.  Luckily, none of us drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for Adam when it happened.

Oh, yes, please call Adam's mother & tell her he is okay.  He can't write because of the cast.  I got to ride in one of the search & rescue Jeeps.  It was great.  We never would have found Adam in the dark if it weren't for the lightning.

Scoutmaster Ted got mad at Adam for going on a hike without telling anyone. Adam said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him.  Did you know that if you put gasoline on a fire, the gas will blow up?

The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did & also some of our clothes.  Matt is going to look weird until his hair grows back.

We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Ted gets the bus fixed.  It wasn't his fault about the crash.  The brakes worked okay when we left.  Scoutmaster Ted said that with a bus that old, you have to expect something to break down.  That's probably why he can't get insurance.

We think it's a super bus.  He doesn't care if we get it dirty, & if it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the bumpers.  It gets pretty hot with 45 people in a bus made for 24.  He let us take turns riding in the trailer until the policeman stopped & talked to us.

Scoutmaster Ted is a neat guy.  Don't worry, he is a good driver.  In fact, he is teaching Johnny how to drive on the mountain roads where there aren't any cops.  All we ever see up there are huge logging trucks.

This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks & swimming out to the rapids.  Scoutmaster Ted wouldn't let me because I can't swim & Adam was afraid he would sink because of his cast (it's concrete because we didn't have any plaster) so he let us take the canoe out.  It was great.  You can still see some of the trees under water because of the flood.

Scoutmaster Ted isn't crabby like some of the other scoutmasters.  He didn't even get mad because we forgot to take our life jackets.  He has to spend a lot of time working on the bus so we are trying not to cause him any trouble.

Guess what?  We have all passed our first aid merit badges.  When Andrew dived into the lake & cut his arm we all got to see how a tourniquet works.

Steve & I threw up, but Scoutmaster Ted said it was probably just food poisoning from the leftover chicken.  He said they got sick that way with food they ate in prison.  I'm so glad he got out & became our scoutmaster.  He said he sure figured out how to get things done better while he was doing his time.  By the way, what is a pedal-file?

I have to go now.  We are going into town to buy some more beer & ammo.  Don't worry about anything.  We are fine & tonight it's my turn to sleep in Scoutmaster Ted's tent.

Your loving son,


"If the appetizer is so belligerent,
what will the entrees be like?"

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?----fishducky