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Monday, December 2, 2013

AW, C'MON--DON'T BE CHICKEN!!


This first item is from an old post.  It really happened!!

When our kids were small we called my husband’s sister, Jackie, one hot 4th of July & asked if we could come over.  She was the only one in the family with a swimming pool.  The kids loved her, as did we. She was a very warm & generous person.  She said, “Sure—come on out!  Can you guys stay for dinner?  We’re having some friends over & you’ll have to bring your own chicken, but I’ll supply the rest of the food.”  We told her that would be great & that we’d be there in a couple of hours.  We called our friend, Larry, who could get his hands on anything, anytime.  (I will explain this reference later.)

We loaded the kids in the car, stopped & picked up a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken & drove out to Jackie’s house.  We all had a fun afternoon swimming & visiting with my sister-in-law, her husband, their friends & everybody’s kids.  When it was time to serve dinner, Jackie said to my husband, Bud, “It’s a good thing you brought a whole bucket of chicken.  I hope we have enough for everyone.”  Bud told her not to worry—we had another chicken in the car & asked her if he should go get it.  She said, “Yes, please.”  For some unknown reason, Jackie was shocked when Bud brought in the chicken from the car.  Perhaps it was because she expected more KFC.  What Bud brought in was not more KFC.  It was a LIVE chicken, in a cage!  (Supplied by Larry.)  She asked him why & he explained, simply, “You told us to bring our own chicken, so we did!”

(Note from Larry:  If you want a live chicken on the 4th of July, it’s much easier if you order ahead.)
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The next two are from notalwaysright.com, a very funny website that prints true dialogues that are sent in about customers (& other stupid people).

Me: “Hello, how may I help you?”
Customer: “Hi, can I have a small pork fried rice, please? Without pork.”
Me: “A small pork fried rice, without pork?”
Customer: “Yes… can you add some chicken to that?”
Me: “Um, so you want a small chicken fried rice?”
Customer: “No. I want a small pork fried rice, no pork, with chicken.”
Me: “Sure… anything else?”
Customer: “Yes, I also need a small chicken and broccoli.”
Me: “Sure, is that all?”
Customer: “Yes…” (pauses) “Oh… and no broccoli in the chicken and broccoli!”
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(A family sits at a table in a restaurant specializing in steak dishes.)
Me: “Hi guys, welcome to [restaurant]. Let me just tell you about today’s special, the prime rib with–”
Customer: “We don’t need to hear this. Just stop.”
Me: “So, you already know about the special? Great! Would you like to start with any–”
Customer: “No! We’re vegetarians!”
Me: “Oh, all right, well we have a few vegetarian dishes on the–”
Customer: “No! Listen, we know what we want already.”
Me: “Okay, great. Go ahead.”
Customer: “Finally! The kids will have the chicken nuggets, my husband will have the chicken burger, and I’ll have the chicken strip salad.”
Me: “Sure.  Anything else?”
Husband: “I’ll have extra bacon on the burger.”
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Don't think this is funny?
Perhaps you have to "chickenize"
your sense of humor!! 



a word search puzzle for you:
(The answers are at the end of this post.)

Lots of cartoons today.
Apparently, chickens are funny!!















This is my name written in duckies:

PLEASE help Janie Junebug in her attempt to send her former mother-in-law 80 cards for her 80th birthday!!  [Here's the link] 

Did you know that Hell comes in two styles for chickens?  Original & extra crispy!!----fishducky

Word search answers:

 







19 comments:

  1. Love your name in duckies. Boring people might want their name in lights - but your way is much more better.

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    1. I LOVED writing it!! The website is http://ducksarethebest.com

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  2. Oh goodness, where did you find those comics?! Too funny!!

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    Replies
    1. Glad you liked them!! When are you going to post again?

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    2. I just read your post for today--WELCOME BACK!!

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  3. Because of you I'm going to spend the rest of the day thinking about a chicken doing the nasty with an ostrich. It isn't a pretty image.

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    Replies
    1. That's because you (& I) have the weird mind of an artist!!

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  4. So for today you are Fishchickey.

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    Replies
    1. To paraphrase what people used to say to Sen. McCarthy: I am not, now, nor have I ever been a fishchickey!!

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  5. That joke about the so-called vegetarians in the steak house reminds me of my daughter. When she was a teenager, she told me she'd really like to be a vegetarian... if only she liked vegetables.

    Fun stuff, as always. That four chicks in the hot tub cracks me up every time I see it.

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    1. My daughter & her cousin were roommates in Italy for a while. They decided to give up eating meat, which was no biggie for my daughter because she never cared much for it, anyway. The reason I don’t think it was for humanitarian reasons is that they still ate fish. When I asked them why fish was still in their diet, they said they didn’t want to give up anchovies on their pizza.

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  6. LOVE the first chicken picture … HAHaaaaa … the video I have seen before… still cracks me up! That's a lotta chicken jokes there, fishducky! hahaa

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  7. What did you do with the live chicken afterwards?

    Love,
    Janie

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    Replies
    1. I honestly can't remember. Jackie's husband was a vet--he probably took it to his office so it would be adopted!!

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  8. I laughed pretty hard all through this.

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  9. LOL it is interesting to know how we want the flavour but not the actual thing.

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Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.