Follow

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

THE VERY POOR FAMILY



Once there was a very poor family.  The mother and father were poor and so were their children.  Even their maids, cook and butler were poor.  When they sat down to a simple dinner of, say, prime rib, baked potatoes and Caesar salad, they had to be careful not to overeat because the leftovers would be needed for the next day’s lunch.  Their handmade clothes were sewn of silk, not the velvet that they would have preferred.  They had a carriage and a coachman, of course, but the carriage was last year’s model.  Life was very unkind, indeed—how long could they continue this hardscrabble existence?  Would the poor man have to get a job?

One day an itinerant lottery ticket salesman knocked on the door of their castle.  The poor man didn’t want to buy any tickets at first because he was short on cash, but the salesman had a strong feeling he had the winning ticket with him.  The poor man (hereafter known as P. M.) knew this because the salesman said, “I have a strong feeling I have the winning ticket with me.  If you buy this $1.00 ticket, you could win a gazillion dollars.  Even after taxes, you’d probably have half a gazillion and that should last you the rest of your life!”  After much thought, P. M. sent one of his poor servants to fetch him a dollar from under his mattress and he bought the ticket.  “Thank heavens,” P. M. thought, “In a few days all my financial problems will be solved.”

Soon the day of the drawing of the lottery numbers arrived.  P. M. and his wife sat in their matching pure leather recliners, which they had gotten on sale from La-Z-Boy, and turned on their large sized flat screen HDTV (also last year’s model).  They watched intently as the numbers were drawn and would you believe-- they lost!
 
His very first thought was to sue the salesman who obviously sold him a defective ticket.  As they sat in front of the TV, many commercials came on.  Most of them were by lawyers who said things like, “Did you ever take this medicine and break a fingernail?  You may be entitled to money!”  and “Did you ever touch this stuff and now you have a slight headache?  We can get you cash!”

The ads sounded very sincere—and lucrative!  P. M. got on his computer (last year’s, too) and looked for attorneys.  He called the law firm of Dewey, Cheatham and Howe (who used to handle Johnny Carson’s legal work) and made an appointment.  They sued every pharmaceutical company and manufacturer of possibly dangerous products known to man.  

True, most of their cases were dismissed, but enough made it to trials which they won to get P.M. his half a gazillion dollars and more!  He never did have to get a job or eat day old prime rib again.  He gave his household staff got a big raise and everyone lived happily ever after.











Never let anyone convince you that failure is not an option because it most certainly is----fishducky

 


  

23 comments:

  1. Maxine is one of my heroes. Big time. I want to be her when (if) I grow up.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha, good story! makes a few points about the way we live compared with the rest of the world doesn't it, we are all rich compared with some other societies and yet we hear so many complaints.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The MAIN talent of some people is bitching about their situation!!

      Delete
  3. I am also sorely disappointed when the lottery company draws numbers that don't match mine, week after week after week after week...if I spent a lot of money on tickets I could be in some serious trouble, but I limit myself to $5 and that not every week either.
    So sad (hah!) that the story family has to live with last years models and only silk clothes. Wonder what they'd think of my cheap cotton clothes and the five years old TV which is the newest thing here.
    Some people don't know when they're well off, always seeing the greener grass on the other side.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are you trying to say you DON'T feel sorry for them?

      Delete
    2. You nailed it. I don't feel one bit sorry for them.

      Delete
  4. I have never won the lottery but I do know 2 people who have, one was a girl at school her dad won the lottery, she was a popular kid most of the class liked her but after her family won the lottery we all didn't like her so much and I worked with a fellow who won big prizes twice in the lotto he just didn't tell anyone much mostly a good move.
    Merle............

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My only (semi) connection with lottery winners is that someone who won the CA lottery bought my cousin's beach house!!

      Delete
  5. Replies
    1. Let's hope there'll be a full moon in your future!!

      Delete
  6. fun story, Fran... I have known PMs who will go into debt so they can say ... we had a good Christmas ... never mind rent is due ... BUT they huge TV ...

    I have threatened to buy a lottery ticket and, as a PW ... if I won? I might buy someone a Christmas gift.. ha

    Have you 'liked' Maxine's Facebook page? hilarious

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wouldn't mind if you bought me a present!! I'm going to check out Maxine's Facebook page.

      Delete
  7. I always wonder about lottery winners who say they won't quit their jobs. I bet most of them do eventually. Bosses don't generally like having rich people on their payroll.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It would probably depend on if you REALLY loved your job!!

      Delete
  8. I can't win because I don't play. The lottery is a poor people's fantasy tax.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That would MOST definitely lower your chances of winning!!

      Delete
  9. Hahahaha! Maxine at the end is hysterical!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Actually, I'm not sure if it's Maxine or Janie!!

      Delete
  10. hahaha good story, I know some people just like that!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I often daydream about what I'd do if I won the lottery. I'm certain it wouldn't change me :)

    ReplyDelete

Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.