Wednesday, March 27, 2013


I wouldn’t last long in India—their rules are too confusing:

Notices in English for tourists in Gujarat-India

In an Ahmedabad Hotel:
Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please.. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read this notice.

In a Surat hotel lobby:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

In the elevator in Hotel Tex Pallazo, Surat :
To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor.  
Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

In a Baroda hotel elevator:
Please leave your values at the front desk.

In a hotel in Jamnagar :
Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily

In an Ahmedabad hotel near Gujarat College
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

Edwards Laundry on Relief Road, Ahmedabad:
Drop your trousers here for best results.

In a Bhavnagar hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is requested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

In a Anand laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

In a hotel at Junagadh:Take one of our horse driven city tours--we guarantee no miscarriages.

Advertisement for donkey rides (on the famous white asses) in Rann of Kutch :
Would you like to ride on your own ass?

In a 5-Star Hotel cocktail lounge in Ahmedabad:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

In the office of a Ahmedabad gynecologist:
Specialist in women and other diseases

In a Bharuch hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

There are a whole lot of cities & towns in the US I’d rather not live in—or even visit.  Here is just a small sample of the hundreds I found (& they ALL really exist!):

Asylum, PA
Big Butt, NC
Boogertown, NC
Boring, MD
Cyclone, WV
Ding Dong, TN
Doghouse Junction, CA
Dynamite, WA
Eek, AK
Embarrass, WI
Finger, TN                                          
Ghoul Creek, WA
Gun Barrel City, TX
Hateful Hill, VT
Hell For Certain, KY
Hellhole Palms, CA
Hooker Corner, IL
Lawyers, VA
Looneyville, TX
Mosquitoville, VT
Mud Hole, FL
Nameless, TN (Although I might send my daughter there)
Not, MO 
Nowhere, OK
Odd, WV
Ordinary, KY
Peculiar, MO
Pee Pee, OH
Poop Creek, OR
Poor Town, NC
Purgatory, ME
Roachtown, IL
Satan’s Kingdom, RI
Spider, KY (I put this one in for Maggie)
Suckerville, ME
Tick Bite, NC
Tightwad, MO 
Waterproof, LA
Wimp. CA

Here are some that I MIGHT consider:

Good Intent, NJ
Novelty, OH
Okay, OK
Sensation, AZ
Surprise, AZ

Actually, I MIGHT consider
some of these, too!

And I DEFINITELY would like to go to:

Cash, AR
Cool, CA
Helper, UT
Hot Coffee, MS
Nice, CA
Perfection, NY
Superior, WI
Welcome, FL
Wise, VA

And there’s always:

Why, AZ
Why Not, MS

BIG NEWS!!!!! (At least for me):

“Fishducky’s Fables” (a brand new book written by me and released by Wayman Publishing) will be available on Amazon beginning this Friday, March 29th.  Barnes and Noble will have it in about 6 weeks.  You can get it as an ebook for $3.99 or in paperback for $8.99.  This is what it looks like on the outside.  (The inside’s even better!)  No, that is not my picture on the cover.

But wait, there’s more!  From now until the end of May, any time you purchase one of Wayman Publishing's books/eBooks and send the verifiable receipt number to waymansweepstakes@gmail.com you will be automatically entered for a chance to win an iPad mini! 

Go here for further details:

This is sort of cool--I've never been an atlas before----fishducky