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Monday, August 11, 2014

THE OLD BIBLE WAS HOLEY, BUT STILL WHOLLY HOLY




Homophones are two or more words that may or may not be spelled differently & are pronounced the same.  They have different meanings.

Sum some a lode of a load of Examples of homophones I thought of:

I had some chili in Chile because I was chilly.

The burro liked to burrow in the borough.  He wasn't really pompous, but he was from Argentina; that alone made him a pampas ass.

 Just leave the leaves; you’re due to do whatever you do with the dew.

Not only was the band banned, but the bard was also barred.

I have the right to write about the rite of a playwright.

He bawled when he discovered that the girl he balled was bald.

He can easily tell which doctor is the witch doctor; he knows he has a bone through his nose.

He was aweful of that awful offal.

She was at the peak of her pique, so the doctor agreed to take a peek, but to be honest, he was losing patience with his patients.

She wanted to wring his neck; the ring he had given her wasn't gold, just gilt, but he felt no guilt.

The cheap husband sent his wife perfume from his trip; the scent only cost one cent.

The Brooklyn ram was very generous with his belongings.  When his wives asked if they could borrow something, he always said, "Of course, youse ewes can use it." 

Even though he was just born, the new gnu knew who his mother was. 

He wasn't a very good boxer; he would faint at a feint.

It took forever for her to select a caramel; she just couldn't seem to choose her chews.

The horse’s groan had grown until it was hoarse.

The bride was so fat she needed the assistance of her assistants to alter the altar. 

Flu germs flew through the flue, making the old wretch retch.

She had seen the artist’s sea scene & wanted to see if the painting with the sail was for sale.

He had such a mean mien that no one wanted to stay at his hostile hostel.

She looked around, frightened, until the doctor caught her eyes & she knew he had to cauterize the wound.

Even though his intended was dressed in her bridal gown as she held his bridle, the whore's horse neighed "Nay" to the minister's questions. 

Peta just can’t bear it when a bear is bare.







I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes----fishducky

 






28 comments:

  1. Groan.
    And it may be my Ozzie pronunciation, but I would dispute some of those words sounding the same (pompous/pampas).
    LOVE the paws button. There are too many of them here.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's not my fault if you guys talk funny--they're REAL homophones in California!!

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  2. And there are yet more believe it or not.

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    Replies
    1. I looked THROUGH & THREW out the ones I didn't WANT (as is my WONT)!!

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  3. and we wonder why folks can't spell even using spell check

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    Replies
    1. A pome four ewe:

      Spel Chek
      I halve a spelling checker,
      It came with my pea see.
      It plainly marks four my revue
      Mistakes I dew knot sea.

      Eye strike a key and type a word
      And weight four it two say
      Weather eye am wrong oar write
      It shows me strait aweigh.

      As soon as a mist ache is maid
      It nose bee fore two long
      And eye can put the era rite
      Its rarely ever wrong.

      I've scent this massage threw it,
      And I'm shore your pleased too no
      Its letter prefect in every weigh;
      My checker tolled me sew.
      ArcaMax.com

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  4. Good, better - caught her eyes & she knew he had to cauterize - BEST!!

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  5. I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes----

    You snuck this one in at the end and I almost missed it. And that would have been a shame because this is a line I can use. Have a terrific week.

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  6. Youse ewes! I love that. Long ago I had a neighbor who was from Boston. She thought she was rather hoity-toity. She told me she couldn't stand the way I said "hey" instead of "hi." I did not utter a word when she said "youse guys."

    Love,
    Janie

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  7. When I see sentences like those I am ever so glad I was born here and don't have to learn this nonsensical language.

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  8. This was great! No wonder they say English is a difficult language to learn. Glad I was born here, I guess, so that this all made perfect sense to me--LOL! Oh! And I LOVE the spell-checker poem, too--OMG! :)

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  9. English is quite a todo for sure ... our slang? oh, baruther ... love the poem and well, all the stuff ... I remember what fun my son and I had with homophones when I homeschooled him for a couple of years ~ 4th and 5th grades ~ we'd get reeeal tickled...

    " used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes----"

    yep ... hahaaaa

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    Replies
    1. I are a excellent speaker of English!!

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  10. This was the hardest lesson I had to teach my kids. haha Now they love to play a game using homophones. By the way how did you break your arm again? Email me and let me know. If you can email me that is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Eye'll email ewe. Why wood ewe think eye canned?

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  11. The 'bored of education' bothers me. I'm convinced it should read bored with education.

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    Replies
    1. I don't draw the cartoons. I do the best I can, but you're probably right!!

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  12. These are all fantastic, and I agree that your line about "natural causes" is the best! Even your off the cuff Spel Chek poem is a classic!

    Julie

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    Replies
    1. Aye'm sew glad you liked them--but the Spel Chek poem wasn't mine!!

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  13. I used to mix plane and plain a lot! I have to learn about homophones in uni and sometimes they mess with my head so much, I have to check the simplest things online, lol.

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    Replies
    1. It's got to be MUCH harder if you are not a native born English speaker!!

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