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Friday, December 26, 2014

WHAT KIND OF NOISE ANNOYS AN OYSTER?


Have you ever gotten exasperated irked piqued displeased put out chagrined nettled in a bad mood in a temper teed off ticked off bent out of shape irritated cross angry vexed sore pissed off a little annoyed?  You're not alone!!

Bud & I had taken the kids to Universal Studios.  We were early & waiting in line for the gates to open.  A young couple crowded into line in front of us.  They were alone & not connecting with anyone who was already in the line.  I guess I didn't have too much patience that day, because I found myself saying, in a very loud voice, "May I have everyone's attention, please. These people (& I pointed them out) are obviously more important than we are & are in a big hurry because they cut into the line instead of waiting at the end.  Would everyone just ignore fairness & common courtesy & let them ahead of you, please?"  They left.  I'm never sure what's going to come out of my mouth, but I'm glad that did!!

Do you ever get tired of telemarketers calling & yet you’re too polite to just hang up?  Me, too.  I think I got even some time ago when I was very busy & someone called me with an offer for pre-need funerals.  “I told him, “I’m so sorry—I wish you had called last week.  I died yesterday!”

One of my Blogger friends, the Chubby Chatterbox, posted this comment on Cranky Old Man's post about telemarketers:


I used to be on a "no call" list but now the solicitation calls come fast and furious. The only satisfaction I get is when someone calls to sell me something I ask them to wait so I can go fetch my credit card. Then I go watch Wheel of Fortune. It tickles me to wonder how long they stay on the line. Mrs. C. tells me this is a wicked thing to do and these folks are just trying to make a living. I tell her there are other, better, ways to do that.


This guy did even better with his telemarketer:


For an interesting way someone else handled a telemarketer
click here.




Does your significant other ever drive you up the wall?



Some other things that annoy me:

Labels that don't peel off:

When you think you've found a parking space but you haven't:


 The guy who thinks he owns the parking lot:

 This--in a public restroom:

Butter that's stronger than bread:

Maybe this knife would help:


 An eraser that doesn't:



Apparently, even the Christ of the Andes statue can be annoyed:
click here


This knock knock joke fits in well here:

Annoyer: Knock, knock.

Annoyee: Who's there?

Annoyer: Interrupting cow. 

Annoyee: Interru...

Annoyer: Mooo!!


The most annoying joke of all time:
Annoyer: Knock-knock.
Annoyee: Who's there?
Annoyer: Banana.
Annoyee: Banana who?
Annoyer: Knock-knock.
Annoyee: Who's there?
Annoyer: Banana.
Annoyee: Banana who?
Annoyer: Knock-knock.
Annoyee: Who's there?
Annoyer: Orange.
Annoyee: Orange who?
Annoyer: Orange you glad I didn't say banana?


Ever try to sleep late with a cat around to annoy you?














Reply to everything someone says with "That's what YOU think!!"----fishducky

 




19 comments:

  1. What annoys me is when I get to the end of your post and realize there are no more funnies lol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Would you prefer I went on & on & on & on & on & on & on...? Some people (mostly husbands) think I already do that!!

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  2. I have to think for a bit if I have anything to add to your wonderful list of annoyances. I liked the one with the dog, when people suck the life out of you!

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  3. The homicide detective--OMG!! These were great! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think BOTH the videos showed pure genius!!

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  4. You have telemarketers from your own country? Who speak your language fluently? Wow.
    Loved that homicide call.
    And yes, I am very, very familiar with cats who insist it is time to get up.
    Great post Fran. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I never said they are ALL fluent in English!!

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  5. I have learned to have great fun with telemarketers. I speak with various accents and say things such as, Madam is not available. This is the housekeeper.

    Well, I am the housekeeper. I'm just not sure who Madam is.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I forgot to say I love the Snoopy cartoon. Thoreau, the late great treeing walker coonhound, used to sit with his shoulders pulled up and his head down. I always asked if he was pretending to be a vulture.

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    2. If Snoopy can do it, why not Thoreau?

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    3. Did you mean Madam or THE Madam?

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  6. Love the wind suit flyer meeting his maker. Lots of laughs here. Thanks so much.

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  7. LOVE those telemarketer responses! A few times I'd answer and just keep saying 'hello" as if I couldn't hear anything for a few minutes, then hang up, other times I'd just put the hands
    set down and walk away, then come back and hang it up later.
    Simon's cat was funny too.
    I love coming here and getting the giggles.

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  8. Tony has been annoying me all day. He wanted nothing o do with me while he was watching TV, then the game, but as soon as he hits commercials, and I'm busy he wants to talk... or poke me... or get in my face. *sigh*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Husbands are generally at the top of the "What Annoys You" list!!

      Delete
  9. Your final sentence: Reply to everything someone says with "That's what YOU think!!"

    I used to say "well, that's your opinion". Annoyed the heck out of more than a few people I did.


    ReplyDelete

Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.