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Monday, March 24, 2014

I CAN ONLY IMAGINE WHAT THEIR AUDITIONS WERE LIKE!!



These contestants were obviously NOT on Jeopardy!


National Lottery Jet Set
Eamonn Holmes: What's the name of the playwright commonly known by the initials G.B.S.? 
Contestant: William Shakespeare. 

Chris Searle Show, BBC Radio Bristol

Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna? 
Caller: Japan. 
Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again. 
Caller: Er... Mexico? 



The Weakest Link 

Anne Robinson: What insect is commonly found hovering over lakes?
Contestant: Crocodiles.


Robinson: In olden times, what were minstrels, travelling entertainers or chocolate salesmen? 

Contestant: Chocolate salesmen. 


Robinson: The Bible, the New Testament. The Four Gospels were written by Matthew, Mark, Luke and...? 
Contestant: (long pause) Joe? 

Lincs FM phone-in 
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world? 
Contestant: Barcelona. 
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. 
Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain. 

Steve Wright Show, Radio 2 
Wright: On which continent would you find the River Danube? 
Contestant: India. 

Wright: What is the Italian word for motorway? 
Contestant: Espresso. 

Wright: What is the capital of Australia? And it's not Sydney. 
Contestant: Sydney. 

This Morning 
Judy Finnegan: The American TV show 'The Sopranos' is about opera. True or false? 
Contestant: True? 
Finnegan: No, actually, it's about the Mafia. But it is an American TV show, so I'll give you that. 

BBC Radio Newcastle 
Paul Wappat: How long did the Six Day War between Egypt and Israel last? 
Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days. 

Bob Hope Birthday Quiz, LBC 
Presenter: Bob Hope was the fifth of how many sons? 
Contestant: Four. 

BBC GMR, Phil Wood Show 
Wood: What "K" could be described as the Islamic Bible?
 
Contestant: Er... 
Wood: It's got two syllables... Kor... 
Contestant: Blimey? 
Wood: Ha, ha, ha, no. The past participle of run... 
Contestant: (Silence) 
Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I... 
Contestant: Walked?



ROCK FM
Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci.
Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
Bamber Gascoigne
What was Gandhi's first name?
Contestant: Goosey?
Lottery Host
What is the world's largest continent?
Contestant: The Pacific?

And my favorite:
Beacon Radio
What is the nationality of the Pope?
Contestant: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?
If those weren't funny enough, here are some cartoons:






We actually sent this card one year:

Here's one no one should get wrong:


If this made you yawn, at least it was an honest opinion openly expressed----fishducky