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Wednesday, August 19, 2015

PICK YOURSELF UP, DUST YOURSELF OFF & START ALL OVER AGAIN!!




This gentleman is just admitting his problem, 
not solving it.

The people at BuzzFeed have shown us that, 
with a little thought & effort,
most of our problems can be solved!!

Some examples:
Out of toilet paper?  Use the roller!!


Your roommate forgot to buy toilet paper?


No bowl in your hotel room?  Use the wastebasket!!


Need a boyfriend?  Advertise!!


A child's juice snack can be used by adults!!


Need a cheap shower repair?


Butter too hard to spread properly?


Saving up for a baby seat?


Is there a hole in the toe of your black socks?


Need a way to dunk the cookies in your milk?


Wifi only works in certain areas of your apartment?


Have the carts all been taken?


Forgot your umbrella?



Need to cool off?


Want to be permitted on the subway?


Can't afford two tickets?


Even garbage men need a break!!


Nothing about unicycles on this sign!!


Don't feel like writing a haiku?  Let your robot do it!!


AND THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE:

The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have children if she had to do over again.

"Sure," she replied, "but not the same ones."
____________________
Boss: Have you ever been convicted of a felony or a misdemeanor? That's robbery, rape, car theft, that sort of thing?
Job applicant: No, never convicted!!
____________________
A platoon of Marines was called out to assemble on the drill field, naked, one cold morning.  The drill sergeant is walking up & down the lines, occasionally giving one of them a whack on their rigid penis with his swagger stick.  He would then ask, "Did that hurt?"  The man would answer, "No, Sir!!" & when the sergeant asked why he would reply, "Because I'm a Marine, Sir!!"  He finally approaches one man & gives him a whack.  He asks, "Did that hurt?"  The man answers, "No, Sir!!"  When asked why, he answered, "Because you hit the man behind me, Sir!!"


Some advice for you:
















And for politicians:


The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap----fishducky 

 









14 comments:

  1. Love Charlene's approach to her weight problem. A focused approach.
    And some days an air bag for the PC would be more than welcome.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm thinking of having one installed!!

      Delete
  2. Loved the mother of three answer.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You didn't expect her to lie, did you?

      Delete
  3. My daughter thinks that the WiiFi situation is not uncommon. LOL
    i love that water melon seat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Does she spend much time on the ceiling?

      Delete
  4. Ha! Love that watermelon car seat!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ingenious, that's what you are, making me laugh day after day.
    I like the garbage men taking a break on the swings.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am ABSOLUTELY ingenuous--I hope that means something good!!

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. I guess you'd need a cantaloupe for a newborn!!

      Delete

Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.