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Friday, November 20, 2015

A FASHION GUIDE FOR SENIORS







My friend Carole sent me this.  I don't know if she was worried about my appearance or just being helpful.  Either way, I now offer you this sage advice:

Many people are older and are quite confused about how they should present themselves. They're unsure about the kind of image they are projecting and whether or not they are correct as they try to conform to current fashions. And for those of you receiving this who are getting close to 70, (or 80) keep reading anyway . . . you'll be there. Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations do NOT go together and should be avoided:
 
1. A nose ring and bifocals
2. Spiked hair and bald spots
3. A pierced tongue and dentures
4. Miniskirts and support hose
5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads
6. Speedos and cellulite
7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar
8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor
9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge
10. Pierced nipples that hang below the waist
11. Bikinis and liver spots
12. Short shorts and varicose veins
13. In-line skates and a walker

And the ultimate 'Bad Taste' in fashion:
14. A thong and Depends
 
Please keep these basic guidelines foremost in your mind when you shop.




Can you spot the fashion faux pas in these pictures?

 Shorts should not be worn 
if it's cold enough for a jacket.

White shoes go much better with ermine.

 One should not advertise that they're wearing old clothes.

 A purple coat needs a delicate metallic cane to set it off.

 Work clothes are not to be worn at home.

 A bra should raise the boobs all the way to the waist.

 A touch of color would spark up her outfit.

 Her hat should match Mickey's shoes, not his pants.

 This lovely creature is dressed perfectly!!





A pair of pearl earrings would complete this outfit.




















Have you ever had that horrifying moment when you're looking for an adult but then you realize that you are an adult so you look for an older adult, someone successfully adulting--an adultier adult?----fishducky 

 









17 comments:

  1. If I had running shoes they would shuffle too. Slowly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My running shoes like to hide in the closet!!

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  2. None of this applies to me...I look good in bell bottoms!

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  3. People in general don't know what is appropriate if you've ever seen all the Walmart pics--ROFL! ;)

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    Replies
    1. Do you believe they're not posed & people actually dress like that?

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    2. Since I've on rare occasions seen people dressed weirdly in the couple of warm months up here I imagine if these are southern or southwestern Walmarts where it is warm all year round...??? Well, you never know??? People shouldn't really surprise us much anymore--LOL!

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  4. I can't believe the lady walking with the guy in the tighty whities. Hilarious collection.

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  5. It's true, it's true. I think I used to be a sophisticated dresser but I
    honestly DO NOT care what I wear, anymore. Not only that, "shade of my being a
    depression baby" are coming back to haunt me and I want to get my
    money's worth from all clothing. LOL
    Those depends don't look THAT bad.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Uh-oh, I may have a problem here, shorts with varicose veins. I don't wear short shorts (not outside the house anyway), but I have varicose veins from groin to ankle/mid foot and it's way too hot for long pants in summer.
    Apart from that, I don't try to follow fashion at all. I wear what fits comfortably and is able to be tossed into the washing machine. And bras that lift the boobs where they belong; ABOVE the waist.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think a good bra is the MOST important fashion accessory!!

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  7. Heh, heh! Wet Shawl Night! The jacket/shorts photo is disturbing. Dude might as well be the "Sweet Angel of Death" guy.

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  8. The sad thing about the jacket/shorts is that the guy really looks interested.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That just proves that men are EVEN weirder than women!!

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