Notice of extension of 5 posts a week: In spite of a dearth Due to an abundance of requests to continue, I am going to post Monday through Friday until my brain is empty!!
This video has nothing to do with today's theme.
I found it online for Super Bowl
Sunday & it's too
funny not to share!!
At one time I considered having a boob job; taking them off my stomach & putting them back on my chest where they used to be. Now, since my boobs are referred to in the singular (see my post-mastectomy post here) I wonder if I could get it done for half price. I checked to see what some celebrities had to say about plastic surgery & here's what I found:
"I was going to
have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of
portraits by Picasso."— Rita Rudner
"Beauty lasts five
minutes. Maybe longer if you have a good plastic surgeon."— Tia Carrere
"She got her looks
from her father. He's a plastic surgeon."— Groucho Marx
"Money can't buy
you happiness but it can pay for the plastic surgery." and “I've had so much plastic surgery, when I
die, they will donate my body to Tupperware.”— Joan Rivers
"Plastic surgeons
are always making mountains out of molehills."— Dolly Parton
"One popular new
plastic surgery technique is called lip grafting, or 'fat recycling,' wherein
fat cells are removed from one part of your body that is too large, such as
your buttocks, and injected into your lips. People will then be literally
kissing ass."— Dave Barry
I then decided to check & learn what the actual procedures were like. I have to admit this made me a little nervous:
First they must prep
the body by removing hair.
Then they suction out
neck fat and put it into her cheeks.
And hey, why not swap out her eyeballs why
we’re at it?
How about a whole new
head of hair to go along with that collagen injection?
Now come the breast
implants.
All she needs now is a
tan and she’ll be perfect, right?
Wrong.
More surgery, please!
All the surgery!!!!!
And voila! The final
product.
youtube.com/Buzz?Feed
Even if things go perfectly, there can still be problems:
Sadie, a middle-aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it. God says no and tells her that she has another 30 years to live.
Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she’s got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it.
She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is immediately hit and killed by an ambulance speeding by. She arrives in front of God and complains, “I thought you said I had another 30 years.”
God says, "Sadie, is that you? I didn’t recognize you!!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They actually have made a phone app
so you can choose what you would look like after surgery:
I wish I was as
skinny as I was back when I thought I was fat----fishducky