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Thursday, June 11, 2015

SHOULD I GET A DOG OR A NEW COMPUTER?




I can't decide which I want.  ArcaMax has been kind enough to do some research on the two for me:


FAVORITE FOOD
Dogs: kibbles
Computers: bits

METHOD USED TO END UNDESIRABLE BEHAVIOR
Dogs: hit with rolled up newspaper
Computers: hit control-alt-delete

AFTER DESTRUCTION OF PERSONAL PROPERTY
Dogs: dog not found
Computers: file not found

FAVORITE TRICK
Dogs: roll over
Computers: play dead

COMIC PAGE HERO
Dogs: Dogbert
Computers: Dilbert 
FUN WAY TO MESS WITH THEIR HEADS 
Dogs: peanut butter on roof of mouth 
Computers: peanut butter in CD-ROM drive 

CONSEQUENCE OF VIRUS
Dogs: replace valuable carpeting
Computers: replace valuable data

WIDELY IGNORED GOVERNMENT MANDATE
Dogs: leash law
Computers: Communications Decency Act
 WASTE DISPOSAL TOOL
Dogs: pooper-scooper
Computers: uninstaller

SENSITIVE INTERNAL PROCEDURES
Dogs: must be undertaken by fully qualified professional
Computers: may be undertaken by that guy at work who fixed one kind of like this once

METHOD OF MARKING TERRITORY
Dogs: lifting leg
Computers: "Designed for Windows XP"

UNIQUE BEHAVIOR
Dogs: lick and drag
Computers: click-and-drag

INEXPLICABLE PHYSICAL FEATURE
Dogs: tail
Computers: scroll lock key

ESTIMATED LIFESPAN
Dogs: 12 years
Computers: 12 months

AT END OF USEFUL LIFE
Dogs: euthanasia 

Computers: tax deduction
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This has nothing to do with with computers, 
but I was reminded of my first dog while seeing this picture.
  My dad was working in a grocery store & he got a very large cardboard box (about 3'x3') which probably held toilet paper.  It was about 3/4 filled with shredded paper.  Sitting on top of the paper was an 8 week old pitch black Cocker Spaniel puppy.  I was 5 or 6 & didn't have too much imagination at the time--we named her Inky. 

Now back to our regularly scheduled post: 


I still can't figure it out.  
And what if--like the top picture--I get both 
& the dog likes to use the computer? 


















The doctor said I've got this little piece of brain lodged in my skull, but when they get it out, I'll be fine----fishducky