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Wednesday, July 1, 2015

I SAY "PO-TAY-TO" & YOU SAY "PO-TAH-TO" & I’M RIGHT!!

Couch potato



August 19, 2015 is National Potato Day.
Don't forget to mark your calendars!!


Potatoes have a long history.  Are you familiar with King Frederick II of Prussia?
Would you like to be?  If so, read on:

The Legend of the Potato King

A story in potato prints.
This year marks the 300th birthday of King Frederick II of Prussia, also known as Frederick the Great or, locally, Old Fritz, who is remembered for his feats of guile on both the battlefield and the potato field.
There once was a king called Fritz. 
One day he heard about a new wonder plant from South America: The potato.

He planted a big field in a nearby village and preached to his subjects 
about the potato’s nutritional and economic virtues.

The subjects did not want to be told what to eat 
and rejected Fritz’s potato endorsement.


The king had an idea. He ordered his soldiers to march
 to the village and guard the potato field.

The fortified field piqued the villagers’ curiosity.


The king ordered the guards to go easy on the vigilance at night, 
allowing baited locals to steal the crop for their own gardens.


The potato flourished and has lived on as a staple of the local cuisine ever since.


The story may be just a myth. 

But to this day, people commemorate Fritz 

by putting potatoes on his tombstone.
(Sorry--I can't remember where I got this.)



How do you describe a very angry potato? Boiling Mad.

What do you call a baby potato? A small fry!

What do you say to a 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.

What does a British potato say when it thinks something is wonderful? It’s mashing!

Why did the potato cross the road? He saw a fork up ahead.

Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a commentator.

Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.

Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One day two potatoes, who were best friends, were walking together down the street. They stepped off the curb and a speeding car came around the corner and ran one of them over. The uninjured potato called 911 and helped his injured friend as best he was able. The injured potato was taken to emergency at the hospital and rushed into surgery. 

After a long and agonizing wait, the doctor finally appeared. He told the uninjured potato, "I have good news, and I have bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to pull through.  The bad news is that he's going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life.” 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
A potato, a cucumber and a penis were talking about their awful lives. The potato said, “My life sucks; when I get big and fat they cut me up and fry me.” 

The cucumber said.  “When I get big and fat they cover me in vinegar & throw me in a jar.”  

The penis said, “You think that’s bad?  When I get big and fat they pull a plastic bag over my head, stick me in a dark, damp room and bang my head against the wall till I throw up and pass out!!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 A guy walks into the doctor's office with a baked potato in each ear, and french fries stuck in his nose. The man says, "Doc, I feel terrible. What's wrong with me?" The doctor says, "Well, first of all, you need to eat more sensibly!!" 
above jokes courtesy Jokes4us.com




How french fries are actually made.


This was in my doctor's office:




Here's more Mr. Potato Head for you:

























I bet my son that I take any subject & make it interesting & funny.  Did I win?----fishducky