Follow

Friday, February 5, 2016

THIS COUPLE WILL CELEBRATE THEIR 122ND ANNIVERSARY TOMORROW

This is our wedding photo taken February 6, 1955:  
That's only 61 years ago, you say?
True, but it's our 122nd anniversary; we've each served our time!!

This is us today:















This is (hopefully) not us:


Remember, marriage is nature's way of keeping people from fighting with strangers!!



Wife: "What are you doing?" 

Husband : "Nothing." 

Wife : "Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour." 


Husband : "I was looking for the expiration date."
-----------------------------------------

After 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the wife felt her husband begin to touch her in ways he hadn't in quite some time. 

It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then slid his hand across her shoulders and neck, slowly worked it down one side, then the other, stopping just over her lower stomach. 

He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, caressed downward again, working down her side, passed gently over and then in between her buttock and down her leg to her calf. Then, he proceeded up her inner thigh, stopping just at the uppermost portion of her leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then suddenly stopped, rolled over and became silent. 

As she had become quite aroused by this caressing, she asked in a loving voice, "That was wonderful. Why did you stop?" 

"I found the remote," he said.

ajokeaday.com


Why is this picture of a Purple Heart here?


Because I awarded it to Bud after ten years 
of marriage as an anniversary gift.
It reads "For Marital Merit Bud 2-6-65".
It is given to people wounded in combat.
He deserved it!!



This is the video our kids made for us last year:

Sorry, wrong video!!
To see ours, click here. 

It's usually best to stay married to your first  spouse because:

I figured I couldn't improve on the anniversary post I wrote last year ("WILL YOU STILL LOVE ME WHEN I'M OLD & FAT?  DARLING, OF COURSE I DO!!") so here it is again, in its entirety (including the cartoons):

                                                    HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO US!!

(As we've already done!!)






Today is our 60th anniversary.  I guess our marriage is going to last, but I have to admit my husband shook me up several years ago.  The kids were small & had gone to bed.  Bud was working on something in his home office & I was watching a special on TV about divorce & how so many women found it difficult to cope afterwards.  I went into his office & said, “We’re never going to get a divorce, are we?”  He immediately answered, “NO!!”  I asked him how he could answer so quickly.  He showed me our financial statement (which is what he had been working on) & said, “Because I can’t live on half of this!!”  For years, on the rare occasions when things would get uncomfortable between us after that, I would remind him of his comment.  One day I did just that & he whipped out a NEW financial statement & proclaimed, “Be careful--I CAN live on half of this!!”

My vision of us riding together
into the sunset of our lives:

Bud's vision:


My husband met the rabbi who married us on the street.  He told Bud he’s not a rabbi anymore.  He’s in real estate.  Bud says that if he’s an ex-rabbi, that would make him my ex-husband.  Another time, my wedding ring, which had been soldered to my engagement ring, broke off.  He claimed that automatically reverted us back to being engaged.  He's a lawyer & he should know.  Do you think he’s trying to tell me something?

I wrote this to my husband on his 80th birthday:

Happy birthday, Honey!!

You’re almost impossible to shop for, so I decided to write you this letter on this, your 80th birthday. 

We started dating when I was 15. It’s difficult (damn near impossible) for me to remember when you weren’t a part of my life. I’m so glad I decided to invite you instead of Earl to my Sweet Sixteen party. My life would have turned out so differently--& not nearly as GOOD!!

You have been with me & stood by me through thick (we have both gotten a little thicker!!) & thin. We have laughed & cried together many times—but mostly, we have laughed!! You have taken me around the world—but I always found my way home!! You have given me a loving--& lovely home (& someone to clean it). You have given me three beautiful children & through them, their spouses & our four marvelous grandchildren. You have allowed me to be myself!!

I thank you for this wonderful life we have had together & I’m looking forward to more.

I LOVE YOU MORE THAN I COULD EVER SAY!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Then there’s the couple who were celebrating their 27th anniversary.  He gives her a beautiful bouquet of roses.  She looks at them & asks him why there are only 23 flowers.  He tells her there’s one for every good year of their marriage.  She smiles sweetly & tells him that she understands.  She then removes two roses from the bouquet & drops them in the wastebasket.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, “If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.” 

The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted, “Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die.”

The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.

The man asked. '”Who are you? “

“I am your guardian angel,” the voice answered.

“Oh, yeah?” the man asked “And where the hell were you when I got married?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A couple celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. When they were asked what their secret was to a long lasting marriage the husband said, "We take the time to go out two times a week for a candlelight dinner, soft music and a night of love in a nice hotel.  She goes on Tuesdays, and I go on Fridays."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s a couple’s 50th wedding anniversary and to celebrate, their son invites the family to an anniversary dinner at his house. During the evening, he gets very emotional every time he hears his dad call his mom by such endearing terms as ‘darling’, ‘sweetheart’ and ‘my love". It’s clear to him that his parents are still very much in love. While his mother is out the room, he goes over to his father, kisses him and quietly says, "Dad, I’m so pleased for you both. I think it's fantastic that after 50 years you’re still calling mom by those loving pet names." 

His father, looking very embarrassed, says, "Things are not always what they seem to be, son. I must tell you the truth--I forgot your mother’s name about 5 years ago."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
On their 25th anniversary, their son goes to his parent's house.  He finds his father in the bathroom, crying.  The son says, "Don't be ashamed of crying, Dad.  I know how you must be overwhelmed by having such a wonderful wife for 25 years."  His father says, "You don't understand.  On our wedding night, I got so mad at your mother that I tried to kill her.  I only stopped when she told me that if I killed her, they'd put me in prison for 25 years.  I would have been a free man today!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I know this is a long post, but we've had a long marriage.  Susan at I Think Therefore I Yam recently sent this & there was no way I could not include it:

WHAT I WANT IN A MAN

 Original List: (age 20)
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 30)
1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries 

What I Want in a Man,  Revised List (age 40)
1.  Not too ugly
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10.  Shaves most weekends

What I Want in  a Man, Revised List (age 50)
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Can tow a Caravan
4. Can cook a BBQ
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Appreciates a good TV dinner
7. Helps with the housework

What I Want in a Man,  Revised List (age 60)
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where I have put things
3. Can still tow a van without causing chaos on the road
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Doesn't notice my facial hair and wrinkles
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Stops trying to tell jokes 

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (today, age 80)
1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet
3. Remembers where we both live


You might enjoy this song about "senior" love.


I found this on River's blog & had to include it:


Should I give Bud this card?















  


Tomorrow, February 6, is National Lame Duck Day.  The best example of a "lame duck" is an incumbent politician who lost in the previous election.  If you are an actual duck & you are lame, seek immediate medical attention----fishducky

 




22 comments:

  1. A very, very happy anniversary. To you both.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 61 years of wedded bliss, congratulations.
    I love that video your family made.
    Happy Anniversary.

    ReplyDelete
  3. These are good. A few years ago, I knew this married couple that seemed to get along in their own little funny mean way. The wife said "we are only together because of the kids" Neither one of us want them".
    Happy anniversary! You were a beautiful bride.
    Lisa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you--I never considered myself beautiful!!

      Delete
  4. A very happy anniversary to you. Marriage is funny isn't it? Well....some days, not so much.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you!! Funny--peculiar or funny--ha,ha?

      Delete
  5. All those years together is quite an achievement. Happy Anniversary.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Staying together was easier than training a new husband--or wife!!

      Delete
  6. Wow! 15? My brother and his wife have almost the same starting time, she was 14, he 15. They now have three sons and eight grandchildren under nine. Happy anniversary.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My oldest granddaughter is 24--& I'm still 36!!

      Delete
  7. Happy Anniversary to a handsome, fun couple. Loved the video your daughter made and totally cracked up at your grandson redoing Bud's redo of Burt Reynolds. That is a keeper video.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I thought he looked as good as Burt!!

      Delete
  8. Happy Anniversary, thank you for this treat

    ReplyDelete
  9. Happy Aniversarh to the both of you. May God bless you both with good health and happiness and lives full of fun and love. Amen.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If it's not fun, it's not worth it!!

      Delete
  10. Happy Anniversary Fran! Those lists about what I want in a man were hilarious. I snorted few wine out my nose.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you--the credit for those goes to Susan!!

      Delete

Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.