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Monday, March 7, 2016

AN ADDENDUM TO YOU THINK YOU'RE OLD? TAKE A LOOK AT THESE GUYS!!



I wrote this, obviously, when I was 73. 
Every word  Most of it  Some of it is true.
Years 74-81 haven’t seen much improvement.


AN ODE TO BEING SEVENTY-THREE

My legs are sore.  I need a cane.
My body has gone quite insane.
My breasts were perky as a song.
My bra size now is 40-Long.

I cannot hear.  I cannot see.                
I have to pee.  Oh, woe is me!             
My body’s fat.  My skin is thin.        
I do not like the shape I’m in.  

I cough–I cough until I choke. 
I’m going out to have a smoke.
My bones are brittle, I fear my fate.
I’m liable to disintegrate.

My memory now seems to have gone.
Who is that standing on my lawn?
It’s my husband Bud–or is his name Paul?
I thought he died–I can’t recall.

The thermometer says it’s 63.
I don’t know why it lies to me.
I can’t stop sweating–watch me pour.
My body says it’s 104.

My joints creak and pop so bad
I’m like a steel drum from Trinidad.
Leg cramps woke me again last night.
Why is my skin so loose and my muscles tight?

My health is iffy.  I may not thrive.
But life is good–and I’m still alive!
And yet I wonder more and more

What I’ll be like at seventy-four!
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My youngest son Blake was 52 this year.  I am 36.  The best way to explain this anomaly is to tell you about something that I read in one of Kirk Douglas’ books.  A “senior” movie actress was being interviewed.  The reporter said, “Forgive me, Madame, but I have to ask.  Your son (who was also a star) admits to being 56.  You claim to be 63.  How can this be?”  Her answer (& mine): “He has his life—I have mine!”

----fishducky


6 comments:

  1. Love that movie actress's quote.

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  2. Your body may be being treacherous, but your mind is active and agile still.

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    Replies
    1. That's the only part of me that still works well!!

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  3. Love your poem. So, so true. Cracked up at the bra size. I can so relate.

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    Replies
    1. I had a mastectomy so now I only have ONE that size!!

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Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.