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Wednesday, June 15, 2016

NEVER PLAY FETCH WITH AN EMU (& OTHER THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER DO)

Emus just aren't good at fetch:

I don't mean to be dictatorial, 
but there are some things you should just never do, such as:

Look a gift horse in the mouth butt:


Never demand that a pelican apologize:


Don't count your chickens ducks before they hatch,
although you may have trouble getting them to stay
 still long enough to count afterwards:


Don't cry over spilled milk
(especially if you're my son):

One day when they were small, the kids were having lunch & I was at the sink, with my back to them.  Blake knocked over his glass & spilled his milk.  I wiped it up & poured him some more.  He knocked over his glass again, & again I wiped it up & poured him more.  I warned him not to do it again or he would be sorry.  I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he deliberately knocked it over one more time.  I picked up the gallon milk bottle (which had probably a quart or so left in it) & emptied it on his head!  Childish, I know, but it made a beautiful waterfall--or, I guess, a milkfall.  He didn’t even cry; he just sat there with his little mouth hanging open in amazement as the milk cascaded over his head.  As far as I know, none of our kids ever deliberately knocked over their milk again.  Not while I was in the room, anyway.

To see why you should never use a power drill
to eat corn on the cob, click here.


Never dip your pen in the company ink.
(This has nothing to do with office supplies!!)

Never apologize when you were right
(except to your wife!!)




Never eat at this place:

Never quit your bad habits;
nobody likes a quitter!!

Some adage & cliche cartoons for you:
















Never mind----fishducky