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Thursday, June 15, 2017

IT'S THE YEAR 5777 IN THE JEWISH CALENDAR...



 Isn't it time we had our own Zodiac? 
 It could even be compatible with the current months.
Of course, being Jewish it would be centered around food.
The theme of all Jewish holidays is:
They tried to kill us all.
We stopped them.
Let's eat!! 

Here's my suggestion:

January/milk

Yes, you can milk your rhino (if you're brave enough)!!

February/meat
Meat & milk must be kept separate & served on separate dishes.
Who wants a plate of milk, anyway?
Or a glass of lamb chops?





March/bubbes (grandmothers)
She'll make you a snack, so you shouldn't starve
& give you advice, too!!





April/chopped liver
Not considered meat, since it is an appetizer.
Can solve an identity crisis when you ask,
"What am I, chopped liver?"



May/schmaltz (chicken fat)

If you want to know How to Make Schmaltz

(and What To Do With It Afterwards)


June/potato latkes





July/lox (smoked salmon, as opposed to liquid oxygen))
Theory of origin:
Someone dropped a salmon on some hot rocks
& that's how it was born a lox.





August/kishke

Essentially, kishke is somewhat like paprika-spiced Thanksgiving stuffing packed inside of cow intestine, or more often today, in synthetic edible casing. It can be made vegetarian, loaded with root vegetables and grains, or it can be made with schmaltz (chicken fat), matzo meal and vegetables. When cooked, kishke is soft and savory, often simmered whole inside of cholent
 ( an overnight Jewish stew, which is typically started on Friday afternoon and allowed to cook overnight to be eaten at noon on the Sabbath) or baked in the oven.


September/challah








November/gefilte fish

Gefilte fish is a dish made from a poached mixture of ground deboned fish,
 such as carp, whitefish or pike, which is typically eaten as an appetizer.




December/Pepto-Bismol













Bon appetit or גוט אַפּעטיט, as we say in Yiddish----fishducky

 















22 comments:

  1. "Meat and milk must be kept separate and served in separate dishes."
    Why? It's tradition, yes, but how and why did the tradition come about?
    Schmaltz is what we knew as pork fat/lard and when my mum made it after I moved to live with her, I was put in charge of stirring and watching the pan so it didn't burn. We made beef dripping too.
    I remember going to lunch at a friend's house with two of my kids who were the same age as her kids. Her little boy said grace in Hebrew which I had never heard before and all through the meal there was no dairy of any kind on the table. Afterwards, we were offered dessert, canned apricots and ice cream. We accepted and I was surprised to have the apricots served and eaten first and only after those dishes had been cleared away was the ice cream served and eaten. Can you tell me why fruit and dairy must also be kept separate? This woman also had two separate counter tops each with its own sink, so dishes which had meat or dairy could be prepared, served and washed separately.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Because God said so!!
      From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
      Milk and meat in Jewish law
      Halakhic texts relating to this article
      Torah: Exodus 23:19
      Exodus 34:26
      Deuteronomy 14:21
      Babylonian Talmud: Hullin 113b, 115b
      Mixtures of milk and meat (Hebrew: בשר בחלב‎‎, basar bechalav, literally "meat in milk") are prohibited according to Jewish law. This dietary law, basic to kashrut, is based on two verses in the Book of Exodus, which forbid "boiling a (kid) goat in its mother's milk"[1][2] and a third repetition of this prohibition in Deuteronomy.[3]

      Schmaltz, as I know it, only comes from chicken fat.

      Fruit can be eaten with either meat or dairy, but perhaps because the apricots were canned, they might have been tainted with meat.

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  2. I learn something new each time I visit you.

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    Replies
    1. I learn something every time I post!!

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  3. Ha! If the meat were any fresher it would heal.

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  4. Some of this didn't sound edible to me--LOL! But then my Swedish relatives love Potatis Korv (a potato sausage cooked in intestines) and lutefisk (rotten fish that smells the house up for weeks), so bon appetit!

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    Replies
    1. One man's meat is another man's lutefisk!!

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  5. I love the Jewish Yoga one. And I miss Junior's Deli. I even miss Los Angeles because of the wonderful mix of peopel who live there.

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    1. I miss Junior's, too; the new one isn't as good!!

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  6. "I'm a Gemini and you're an idiot" I had to laugh at that one. A lot of funny stuff here, not sure how I feel about being a potato latke but if you say so....

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    1. I'd rather be a potato latke than an Oscar Mayer wiener!!

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  7. So many food rules? The only food rule for Italians is Mangia...actually I think that a grandma rule in every culture.

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  8. Dear Fishducky, the only food listed here that I've eaten is meat--but not since becoming a vegetarian 39 years ago--and challah, which appeals to my carb-loving cells. I've never known anyone Jewish--except you--and so I've not had the opportunity to eat a Jewish meal. And I've not heard of any restaurants here in Independence. But then I've not been looking. I'd like to taste several of these food items--but not chopped liver! Peace.

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    1. Liver & onions, no; chopped liver, delicious!!

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  9. Whoa! I never want to shop at The Ethical Meat Shoppe!

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    1. You mean you don't give any points for being ethical? That's why there are truth in advertising laws!!

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  10. My sign would be potato latkes, which is perfect since I love them. This year was the first year I made them from scratch (twice), and they are just amazingly delicious!

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    Replies
    1. There are 100's of recipes but I prefer the plain ones my bubbe (grandmother) made!!

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  11. Don't know how I missed this one. I was enjoying myself till I saw the picture of the potato latkes, now I am starved they looked so good.

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    Replies
    1. I got hungry reading your comment!!

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Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.