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Thursday, December 14, 2017

YOU TALKIN' TO ME?


(Reworked from several old posts with some new stuff thrown in.)


They didn't even listen to my answer:

I was at a doctor’s office, waiting in one of the operatories, when he & his nurse came in.  They told me they had an emergency & that it would be a little while before they could treat me.  They asked me if they could get me anything while I was waiting.  I told them a margarita would be nice.  No reaction whatsoever!!  I wonder why they even asked?
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He was a really good listener:

My friend was throwing a cocktail party in her apartment.  She finished preparing her platters & set them on the kitchen counter under the window.  Her guests were due in just under an hour.  Pleased to have everything done so early, she took a leisurely shower.  She got dressed, put on her makeup & returned to the kitchen.  It had started raining hard while she was showering & the window above the food was open.  The rain was coming through the dirty window screen & coating the food below.  She climbed on the counter to close the window.  She slipped on the wet, dirty counter, fell on the food & landed on the floor with a sore ankle!!


The phone rang & she limped over to answer it.  She cried & complained at length to the caller about her guest’s imminent arrival, the ruined food, her now dirty clothes & her sore ankle..  The man who was calling responded with short, sympathetic comments & let her continue ranting & raving.  After several minutes, she realized she didn’t know who she was talking to.  After checking, it turned out to be a wrong number.  She asked the man why he had continued to listen to her complain when he didn’t even know her.  He said that she obviously was having such a bad night, he didn’t have the heart to interrupt.
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Maybe he shouldn't have listened:

I went into a public restroom & I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: “Hi, how are you?”

I'm not the type to start a conversation in the men's restroom, but I don't know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed, “Doin' just fine.”

And the other guy says: “So what are you up to?”

What kind of question is that? At that point, I'm thinking this is too bizarre so I say: “Uhhh, not much.”

At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question. “Can I come over?”

OK, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell him, “No........I'm a little busy right now!!”

Then I hear the guy say nervously...

“Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions.”

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When I got tired of listening:

Bud had a ’69 Buick that talked.  I remember we were driving somewhere & trying to have a conversation.  Every few minutes it informed us, “Your window washer fluid is low.”  I finally replied, “Shut up, Harry!!”  I don’t think they made talking cars for much longer. 
























----fishducky


 


22 comments:

  1. Delightful post! You hooked me at "removable ears". I wear 2 hearing aids. Even with those I cannot hear my soft-spoken wife when she addresses her remarks to the kitchen sink or the fridge. I get up and lean in. If she's mad, I take them out and cope with tinnitus. We got married 47 years ago and I never saw this coming.

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    1. I have hearing aids but I don't wear them because they don't help. I can hear people talk but I can't separate the words; especially teenagers.

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  2. The minion has good advice, as always.

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  3. It wasn't until the last question in the stall that I figured it out...very funny.

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  4. I had one of those toilet conversations but luckily it didn't go on long.
    I am often tempted to join in when someone walks up behind me in the store while talking away on their phone.

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    1. You had one of those conversations, too? Awkward!!

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  5. I have had conversations like the one in the stall, with a lady in a department store wearing a bluetooth earpiece, the looks I got but I really thought she was talking to me.

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  6. I am an unashamed (or not very) eavesdropper. And have been blown away be some of the conversations. Mobile/cell phone users often think they are in a cone of silence don't they?

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  7. Yes, people talk to the air now or can look right at you and be having a conversation with an ear bud. Disconcerting! ;)

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    1. It's possible they are (or are NOT) talking to someone!!

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  8. Love the story about the person on a cell phone in the bathroom and the person in the next stall keeps answering the questions.

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    1. Apparent both Arkansas Patti & Jimmy have done just that!!

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  9. I say it's time to find a doctor who serves margaritas! Or at least has his nurse serve them.

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    1. Right!! Why ask if you don't care what the answer is?

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  10. These were cute. The guy talking to the guy that fell off the ladder, reminds me my mom.
    Lisa

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  11. Many years ago, people walking the streets talking to themselves were considered a little nutso talking to voices in their heads, now we have to be careful thinking so many are a little weird when instead they are all wearing those bluetooth things. I find it a little freaky having so many different conversations going on around me where I can only hear one side of things.

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Your comments make my day, which shows you how boring my life has become.