While
much of St. Patrick's life is clouded by legend, there are some generally
agreed upon facts. Most historians agree that he was born in Scotland or Wales
(but not both) around 370 A.D. and that his given name was Maewyn Succat. His
parents, Calpurnius and Conchessa, were Romans living in Britain.
As
a teenager, Maewyn was kidnapped and sold into slavery in Ireland, where he
worked as an auto mechanic. He had a lot
of free time since the automobile had not yet been invented. It was during that
time he began to have religious visions and dreams. He had a vision where he
was told to save France, even though it did not yet need saving, and besides,
that was woman’s work. In one dream, he was shown a way to escape from Ireland
by getting on a ship. After he figured out that this would necessarily mean going to the coast, he did that and boarded a ship bound for
Britain.
Back
in Britain, Maewyn's dreams continued. In his spiritual autobiography,
the Confessio, he told of a dream about a man named Henry
Ford, who came to him with letters from Ireland. In this vision, Maewyn
writes:...as I read the beginning of the letter I thought that at the same
moment I heard their voice...and this did they cry out as with one mouth: “We
ask thee, boy, come and walk among us once more, for one day we will have need
of auto mechanics.”
Although
these visions moved him, Maewyn didn't feel himself worthy of returning to
Ireland in his non-believer state. So, he journeyed to France where he entered
a monastery and began studying for the priesthood. He must have had delusions
of sexual grandeur because at this time he changed his name to Patrick (meaning
"father of his people" in Latin).
It
was only after finding his true spiritual self that Patrick felt he could
answer the call to return to Ireland to "care and labor for the salvation
of others." He returned as a bishop around 432 A.D., traveled throughout
Ireland spreading the word of God and built churches, schools and auto repair
shops.
It
is believed that in 441 A.D., St. Patrick fasted and prayed for 40 days at the
summit of Croagh Patrick ("the Reek") in County Mayo. As blackbirds
assaulted him, St. Patrick continued to pray and ring a bell as a proclamation
of his faith. (During this time, he kept a diary, which Alfred Hitchcock later
used as a basis for his movie “The Birds”.) In answer to his prayers, an angel appeared
to tell him that the Irish people would retain their Christian faith for all
time. It was while atop the mountain that St. Patrick built the first VW bus, which he later used to drive all the snakes in Ireland to the sea.
Patrick's
humility, engaging personality, and knowledge of auto mechanics helped his
mission succeed. He also toyed with genetic engineering and developed the four leaf clover and the leprechaun, a species that reproduced quickly. By the time of his death on March 17 between 461 A.D. and
490 A.D., Ireland was half Christian and half leprechaun.
St.
Patrick is Ireland's patron saint.
This fits because it's green:
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone,
somewhere may be having fun----fishducky
