Thursday, August 27, 2015


...my birthday is September 27th--one month from today--which should give you plenty of time to shop.  If I remember correctly, you didn't get me anything last year!!  You probably thought that I would be to hard to shop for, but that's not so.  Let me give you some gift suggestions (most of which were found on BuzzFeed):

First, let me show you a few things I don't really want:

A light-up spatula for romantic midnight grilling.

A gadget that makes eggs square.

A gizmo for making ice cream while driving.

Face candles

Barbie with a brain

This might be OK for Christmas.

I'm afraid I'd get my money dirty.

Someone might squeeze a lemon on me & dip me in butter.

I definitely don't an earwax vacuum!!

Or a horse head squirrel feeder,
unless they make one big enough for Bud!!

These might be acceptable:

A luggage tag for the world traveler.
A watch that tells the damn truth.

A T-shirt that celebrates the important things in life.

Something to support my back and my ego.

Something that keeps my wine glass from emptying.

Or, when I'd rather have a margarita, a glass that will keep it chilled.

But if you happen to have lots of these

you might consider getting me:

Gold  plated staples to make it easier to continue my fine work.

A crocodile skin umbrella.

Any of the three vehicles above so I can have something simple
 & unassuming to run errands in.

Something sparkly, like this 100.20 carat diamond.

Something to quench my thirst.

And/or something infinitely more practical!!
Surprise me!!

He who laughs last, thinks slowest----fishducky