I know it's true because I read it in the paper!!
Once upon a time there lived a beautiful princess. She was the prettiest of three sisters. Her beauty made the sun stop to shine upon her. She loved to play by the lake with her golden ball. She would do it every day because she enjoyed it so much & neither Netflix nor Kindle yet existed. Once she accidentally dropped the ball into the lake & although many balls will float, golden ones do not. (They do not bounce well, either.) It sunk & she started crying.
Her cry would soften even those who don’t have a heart because it sounded so desperate. It even woke a green frog that jumped straight to her. He asked her why was she crying so loudly & she told him about her missing ball. She said she didn’t know how to reach the ball & she was so sad she couldn’t stop crying. She also asked him how he could talk. He explained that he could because this was a fairy tale.
The frog told her not to worry because he would get her damn ball. Of course, he asked her what will he get in return (besides being able to go back to sleep) & the princess told him he could have anything he wanted without thinking twice. She told him she could give him jewels, clothes & even a frog-sized castle. The frog told her none of it was necessary because all he wanted was her company, dinners together & to share a pillow with her. If she said yes, he would bring her ball back.
The princess agreed even though she had no intentions of keeping her promise. When the frog got her ball back she just laughed & ran to the castle thinking the frog’s demands were a joke.
The joke was on her the next day when the princess had dinner with her father. The food was served on golden plates & they had golden cups. Soon the frog appeared on the door & demanded the princess to keep her promise.
The princess wasn’t thrilled with his visit & she wanted to kick him out but her father was curious. She told him the whole story & her father was angry that she didn’t keep her promise & was ready to throw out an innocent animal that helped her out on the street.
The king allowed the frog to dine with them & ordered his staff to bring a large serving of sautéed flies. He enjoyed the delicious food & took everything he could reach with his tongue. The princess was repulsed by his behavior but had to keep her promise.
After dinner the frog asked the princess to take him to her room so he could rest on her comfortable pillow. She became more & more desperate because she had to sleep next to the sticky frog. Her father said she had already slept with lots of
frogs ugly men & warned her one more time that she had to keep her promise.
The frog fell asleep but the princess stayed up all night. All she could think about was that slimy, wart covered green creature lying next to her.
The next day when the sun appeared the frog got cheerfully out of bed. He offered the princess a deal. He told her that if she kissed him he’d disappear for good. She thought about it & accepted. She closed her eyes, puckered her lips & gave him a kiss. She yelled, “It’s over now; go away!!"
After the kiss, the ugly frog turned into a handsome young man. The princess was astonished by his appearance. She couldn’t believe that such an ugly frog could turn into such a beautiful young man with no warts at all!!
Despite her being a bitch, he asked her if she would marry him. (Hey, free room & board in a castle for life & he’d never need to get a job!!) She accepted & he told her how he became a frog because of a spell cast by an evil witch that could only be broken by a princess granting his wish.
They got married, & even though he still enjoyed an occasional meal of flies & attempted to grab food with his tongue, lived happily ever after.
My reality is different than yours; accept it!!----fishducky